‘The Cafe With No Name’ by Robert Seethaler  (2023) – 191 pages              Translated from the German by Katy Derbyshire

Sometimes the simplest plot for a novel is the best.

In ‘The Cafe With No Name’, Robert Simon opens a cafe in Vienna. It serves alcohol; it’s what we would call a bar and grill. Simon operates the cafe for about ten years. The novel consists of vignettes about the owner, the people who work at the cafe, and its customers.

How can you write a novel about Vienna without at least some scenes along the Danube River? You can’t. When their troubles get too much for them, the residents of this neighborhood often go for walks along the Danube.

Every cafe or restaurant or bar has a fascinating history. Each could have its own interesting story. I am going to show only one example from ‘The Cafe With No Name’, and then I expect you will want to read this novel.

We begin with a conversation between a patron of the cafe, the professional wrestler Rene Wurm, and the cafe owner and operator about the waitress Mila:

“I am, Simon, I’m a good man, aren’t I?”

“You never know for sure, but I think so.”

“Yes, I am. And I want to prove it to her. But first I have to find out if she likes me. You’ve got the cafe, you know how these things go.”

“What things.”

“With women!” Rene exclaimed. “Things with women, for God’s sake.”

On the advice of Robert Simon, Rene gets the courage to approach the waitress Mila and ask her if she would like to go for a walk in the park.

“Yes, I think I would like to, Rene,” she said, and no matter how often he thought back to that moment later in life, he could never say what threw him more off balance that day: Mila’s small hand on his shoulder or the incredible fact that she hadn’t laughed in his face.”

At one point Simon himself has a potential girlfriend. She tells him,

“When I was young a fellow said to me, my dear fräulein , I know you’re too beautiful for me, but I’ll give it a try anyway – will you go to the pictures with me? What an idiot. Did you send him packing? No, I married him. I never understood men, but I like having them around me.”

‘The Cafe With No Name’ is a low-key understated look at life’s disappointments and sad stuff and how we cope with them, as well as the small joys in each day. The cafe isn’t all that successful, but it does have its share of drunks and crazies.

Robert Seethaler does not make the mistake in his novel of making his human characters better than humans usually are.

Grade:   A