‘Willful Disregard’ by Lena Andersson (2013) – 196 pages               Translated from the Swedish by Sarah Death

“She was by turns furious with him and filled with enormous tenderness and love for everything he had ever touched or been touched by (with certain obvious exceptions).”

This is the story of the Stockholm writer Ester and the artist Hugo.

Ester is sent by her employer to interview the famous artist Hugo Rask. They seem to hit it off during the interview and he asks her out to lunch following the interview. She immediately falls intensely in love with him.

“Passion was raging inside her. It’s internal combustion engines were firing on all cylinders. She was living on air.”

However although Hugo sleeps with her three times during the next six days, he wants to avoid a close tie with her at all costs. They were intimate for a few days and Ester thought they were starting a relationship. However after that, Hugo just doesn’t call or contact her for weeks, and Ester almost goes crazy.

She calls him repeatedly and he doesn’t answer. She lingers outside his house and studio when she knows he’s in there. She texts him repeatedly. Still no answer. You might say she almost stalks him. Hugo makes it quite clear that he doesn’t want an ongoing relationship with Esther, but she somehow never gets the message. She keeps grabbing at straws, looking for the smallest signs that he hasn’t totally dropped her.

“Something that had been of crucial importance to her had been nothing but a way of passing the time for Hugo.”

Over and over, Hugo gives some small sign that he might not be as disinterested in Ester as he seems, and Ester builds her hopes up to only once again be disappointed. It gets quite repetitive. I kept waiting for something else to happen, but it never does. Ester never comes to her senses that this guy Hugo is not really interested in her anyway. Her persistence may be because Hugo Rask is a world-famous artist.

Only a famous artist could get away with this behavior and still retain the good opinion of Ester. Finally she rings his doorbell and confronts him. Hugo claims he has been extremely busy with his art with no time to spare. She thinks:

“How can anyone be so stupid as to believe it’s to do with time when people give time as their excuse?”

One wishes and hopes that Ester would give up on Hugo as a lost cause, maybe even hate him a little or a lot, but that never happens.

“If she could only purge herself of that longing for contact.”

Despite my finding the occasional views expressed on current political events rather lame, I found the intensity and insights into this unrequited love plight did hold my interest and attention. Some of Ester’s insights seem quite profound at first but begin to wear thin as her obsession with Hugo continues.

Who is right or wrong here, Ester or Hugo?

Grade:   B